I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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