Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
