mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
