Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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