just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
