Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
