I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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