Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
