butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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