I look better un-naked...
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
