I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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