Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Randomize
