I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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