I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
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