Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
