i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
