I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
