So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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