her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
