oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
