you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
