Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Randomize
