It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
