I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
