Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
She is in my trunk
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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