Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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