ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize