So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
