i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
