All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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