Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
