How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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