whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
These tits shall not be calmed
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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