The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
