"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
