I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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