You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
This is the high leading the old right now
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
