LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
