i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize