i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
