The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize
