Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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