Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Randomize
