super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Randomize
