I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
