I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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