he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
