Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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