Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
