Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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