If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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