it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
